Tuesday, 22 April 2014

Adjusting My Focus

Once again, an absence from blogging, not so much due to laziness this time, more down to trying to see the bigger picture.

Way back in 2012 when I first signed up at Claire's Slimming World group, I knew my journey would be a long one. I guess I didn't anticipate just how hard it would be though, I figured my determination and sticking to the plan would be enough. My body has proved time and again that that simple equation just wouldn't be enough.


Despite the ups and downs of my journey I've stuck with it, however, the last few months have been awful. Any of you that read regularly will know the frustration and upset that the scales have been causing me. Despite following plan, the losses just haven't been coming, and the frustration and upset have just been getting worse.

I walked into the morning weigh in last week, on Wednesday. A day later than normal, and a morning rather than evening weigh in to boot, to be greeted by yet another gain. "Just" half a lb, but it put me yet again a lb heavier than I was at Christmas, and I spent the meeting in tears once more.

When I started, I wanted to get into sz14 clothes. I was unsure what weight that would be, as I'd never been there as an adult, so the figure of 12st was plucked out of the air to be my target. Later on, I decided that I wanted to be a "healthy" weight according to the much maligned BMI charts, so reset my target to 11st. My body has had other ideas, refusing to let me get below 13st 9½lbs no many what food I do or don't throw at it, so the decision has been made. I am at target. I didn't want to let Claire give me my badge and certificate as it would feel wrong. I'm not at the target I want to get to, I'm almost being forced by my body to choose this path. One thing that calling target will do is stop me panicking about the scales. After a chat with Claire, I shall be weighing just once a month or so, to ensure I'm still in target range, and apart from that I won't be getting on them. I shall take a deep breath and enjoy that original target of mine - those sz14 clothes, that have size 12 and 10 wardrobe mates now, that fit. I shall enjoy my fitness levels and my new bike, my love of running and that other target - running Race for Life. So many of the reasons I gave via this blog for losing weight have been achieved, one size tights, fitting my arse into chairs, not getting red and sweaty after walking anywhere, shopping in any shop. It's time to enjoy what I've achieved rather than stressing about what I've decided I haven't.


I shall stop stressing about numbers on a scale that never reflect my adherence to the Slimming World plan, I shall stop trying to follow this, that and every other plan and stick with my favourite Green days and once a month, I shall see what's happening. I shall relax and enjoy my life, my food and the person I now am. One thing I won't be doing is straying off plan, as myself and Hague have been doing that this weekend. Indulging ourselves in all sorts of things, Easter eggs, hot cross buns, pizza, and general food of much beige-ness and crap. Whilst we started off enjoying it, we ended up feeling sick and stuffed and both of us craving good, wholesome, healthy Slimming World food once more, today it has been a relief to return to plan, so here we are, back again on familiar territory.....with a rather big catch up and then getting a good SW food diary :o)

The weekend was a whirlwind really, with lots of bad food....




I didn't eat the enormous hot cross bun though, that was a present for The Parentals...I did counteract some of the over-eating when I picked up my new favourite thing ever...



Yes, I finally have my bike, which is beautiful and amazing and such fun to ride, and has been christened Margot. I also picked up some essentials for my MayCation with TOK...


...and had some rather lovely family time, involving many selfies...




Add in the fabulous drunken, chattery, film night with my BBFF (Boy Best Friend Forever lol) and it's been rather a spiffing weekend indeed, but with all the eating, drinking and being merry over with for now, it's time to get back on the wagon and get you all up to date once more.

Monday, and a day when I woke up after a huge old sleep, no alarm, nothing to get up for, and so Hague left me in bed, I finally stirred at 2pm, feeling rather peckish and so headed downstairs. All the remaining crap had been lovingly fed into our cute little hairy dustbin and so I made myself a small, simple breakfast, all deliciously on plan.


Muesli, fruit and yogurt, with a green tea - simple but tasty. I then got settled into my girl nest whilst Hague watched a few films and I caught up with Masterchef and The Great British Menu, and soon he fancied something to eat, me, being a very lovely girlfriend had insisted he let me run around after him today to properly rest up and so I rustled him up some baked potatoes and salad whilst I had some veggie soup I'd found in the fridge.


I then got myself out to have another lovely bike ride, such a fabulous feeling to just be zooming along under your own steam. I totally love it! We still haven't really found a home for Margot though, so she's currently in the lounge - which I rather like as I can look at her all the time and it adds a certain kookery to the house! Unsurprisingly, after a few days where we've been eating and eating and eating, it wasn't too long before I was hungry again and so got to work on dinner, with me and Hague sort of having the same this time, the only difference was I had Quorn chunk and he had turkey. The rest of the pasta, vegetable and cheese mix was the same, a rarity!


It did use up the last of my squiggly octopus spaghetti though :o( After dinner, I decided I needed a bath as I was feeling a bit achey after my hour of riding and so got myself chilled out with some more catch up telly and a coffee, whilst chatting away to all and sundry! After the bath, I was peckish once more and so did myself a quick snacky type meal to tide me over.


Just some of the syn free Quorn sausages in wholemeal baps accompanied by some carrots and a Danio, plus yet more tea with my HeA of milk that's been keeping me going all day :o)

So here I am, all content after a lovely day on plan, settled in my girl nest with a JadeyPuss nestled in next to me and Dead Snow on the tellybox, a rather nice end to a fabulous weekend and a good note to start my week off with. 

Food Diary (Green)

Free Food
banana
plums
Activia 0% yogurt
homemade veggie soup 
pasta
courgette
cabbage
leeks
cherry tomatoes
pepper
Quorn chunks
low fat Quorn sausages
carrots

Healthy Extras
A - 350 skimmed milk
A - 75g soft cheese
B - 40g Dorset Cereals simply fruity muesli
B - 60g wholemeal bread

Syns
Jacob's cheese baked oddities                5½
25g soft cheese                                       2
20g wholemeal bread                              2
tbsp ketchup                                           1
Danio blueberry yogurt                            3

Total syns                                               13½

It's good to be back, and hopefully calling target will chill me out nicely, and allow my body to get used to where it is so I can be in the right frame of mind to push onwards to 11 stone when the time is right! 

Oh.....and feel free to sponsor me in my efforts to run Race for Life! The sponsorship page is right HERE I hope you've all had a fabulous Easter, and are finding it easy getting yourselves back on track! 

x


3 comments:

  1. girl you rock , you look fab , so glad you have made peace with your body telling you im here - you made it girl , this is you , your happy weight !! your perfect the way you are ! its not about the numbers in clothes or on the scales , its about health and happiness !! i love your story , i hope you still blog every now and again ( i think its time for a ring , id love to see you get married - and i love hearing about lowestoft its like my spirtitual home , i spent every holiday at the denes caravan park ( near the sparrows nest and pea factory lol ) as a kid , i cant wait to take my daughter on holiday there when we can afford it . im at the start of my weight loss journey , but i hope i make it like you . ps you totally deserve your awards , you have come such a long way and deserve it more than most ( who had only a stone to lose for example) once again you rock , you look stunning im so jealous lol all the best for your future enjoy it xxx

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  2. Good for you for letting your body catch up. I've been following you since I joined SW a year last November. I started at 21 stone and have now lon 5 stone. The last few months have been very very slow but I haven't been this size whist an adult and i think my body is just very confused despite me still following the plan as ever.

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  3. Hey I have been reading your blog for a while and I have to say it is incredible how much weight you have lost! I'm sure you have inspired a lot of people. I just wanted to write something for your consideration. You say that your body has decided you can't lose anymore weight, but I wonder have you tried a low sugar diet? Because I thought pretty much the same thing, about 1 stone ago,, but by reducing my sugar intake to below 35g per day (including fruit and hidden sugars) I lost that extra stone in a matter of months, focusing on eating more veggies than fruits, I didn't even have to watch my fat intake so much. Just food for thought! But congratulations on your HUGE weight loss! I'm sure you have added years onto your life.

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