Thursday, 13 March 2014

Success and Stumbles

I had a good think after Tuesday's weigh in, thinking what to do to get a loss on the scales and I decided to go with a few days of Success Express, however, most of Wednesday was spent in bed preparing for my return to work. something I wasn't looking forward to...

I had taken a sleeping tablet and so managed to stay in bed, sleeping for a fair old while after staying up very late. I'd prepped a casserole in the slow cooker, which Hague had turned on and so woke up to a filling Success Express friendly dinner - at least I hope it was, SE is not a plan I follow regularly!

The casserole mix is 35% beans, with the rest being veg, I added in some baked beans and chopped tomatoes, so added in some broccoli to ensure it was 2/3rds superfree on my plate, the free food was made up with a couple of Quorn fillets topped with part of my HeA of cheese. I followed it up with a SE dessert, blueberries (superfree) and yogurt (free).

Hague was out at work when I had to get ready for my return to work, and I got myself up and dressed and then sat on the bed in a state of panic....I managed to get out of the house though and even managed not to get too anxious on the drive in, mainly as I had to go the long way as the direct road is closed and the fog was insanely thick. So, I made it in!

I was proud enough of that fact that it made my #100happydays list. It really was a huge thing for me going back, unfortunately the good feelings weren't very long lasting and during my return to work interview it became blatantly clear that I wasn't exactly ready for a full return as I got very panicky and teary - not the best of starts eh? My Manager said that I should do what I could, and so I ploughed through my emails, did some online training, ate this lot...

...and texted Hague and TOK before the sicky, anxiety got the better of me and I headed home, just under 3 hours under my belt, which I was quite proud of, as I genuinely didn't think I'd manage that. I got home (via Asda for some fruit) and Hague sorted me out a quick dinner,

Not too long after that had gone down we headed to bed, me with a milky hot chocolate, and despite me being in bed most of the day prepping for my night shift, I did manage to sleep, probably all the nervous energy! I hope the day was at least a Success Express success anyway!

Food Diary (Wednesday - Success Express)

Free Food
Tesco three bean casserole mix
chopped tomatoes
baked beans
Quorn fillets
Activia 0% yogurt
vegetable soup (soup mix and chopped tomatoes)

Healthy Extras
A - 350ml skimmed milk
A - 3 Asda lighter cheese slices
B - 60g wholemeal bread
B - HiFi bar

20g wholemeal bread                            2
Options indulgence hot chocolate          3

Total syns                                             5

As I'd not been as late home as I thought I'd be, I offered to take Hague to work, which meant a very early start for me, but I went back to bed to try and get some more sleep before picking him up. On the way back we popped into a local bike shop to choose a bike for me. My work does a Cycle to Work scheme and for once we can manage the payments and so I'll be having a lovely new bike in a few short weeks! 

Isn't she beautiful? After such excitement, we were both hungry and so it was time for breakfast.

Success Express again, and so it was a big bowl of blueberries and a pear, with my HeB of maple figs and an Activia yogurt. Not a combination I've had before, but it was delicious. Not long after that, I took my weary self up for a nap, but a combination of feeling freezing cold and my elbow giving me gyp meant I didn't get much in the way of sleep :o( After more texting and TV watching, I sorted out some dinner - once more a bean casserole, as Hague fancied some today and I'd picked up 3 packs of it reduced!

Quorn sausages, broccoli and sprouts with it today, and a tbsp of honey and mustard dressing on the veggies. It's quite a lot to think about having to have two thirds of your plate as superfree foods, I might be overdoing it a bit, but I really do want a loss this week! Dessert was a Danio and HiFi, as snacks can be synned, superfree or healthy extras. It was delicious, again lol! With that eaten, and Hague shipped off to kickboxing, my mind turned to work - until my Manager rung up and informed me that I could only have a phased return to work with a phased return certificate from my doctor, so if I was to come into work tonight, it would have to be on full duties for full hours, as he pointed out, I'm clearly not ready for that after last night, and so I couldn't go into work at all - rather a frustrating feeling after me building up to it for most of the day, so once more I'll have to head to the Dr's for a note, and get back into the swing of getting back to work next week! At least it's meant I could pick up Hague - as it's seriously horrible out there tonight.

So foggy! Myself and TOK both agreed that it's a very real possibility that there are zombies lurking in all that mist and so I went to get Hague, who was as frustrated as me at the news of my phased return having to be officialised, and then we could get comfy on the sofa, whilst I calmed myself down. A bit of Adam Richman, and a bit of Carry On later and we were ready for dinner, utilising the eggy veggie muffin's I'd made for work.

I topped them with my HeA of cheddar and just melted the cheese under the grill, the carrots are basically a chip alternative, just sprayed with fry light and sprinkled with garlic salt, they really are tasty! The salad is a big ol' pile of spinach, roasted peppers, cucumber, beetroot and some low fat cottage cheese - think that's 2/3rds again! 

Dessert was a while later, once again SE friendly! It'll be followed up with another milky hot chocolate in a nice warm bath before bed! 

Food Diary (Thursday - Success Express)

Free Food
Activia 0% yogurt
bean casserole mix
chopped tomatoes
baked beans
Aldi low fat pineapple cottage cheese

Healthy Extras
A - 350ml skimmed milk
A - 40g reduced fat Cheddar
B - HiFi bar
B - 50g Whitworths maple figs

3 Quorn sausages                                                    3
tbsp Kraft light honey and mustard dressing              1
blueberry Danio                                                       3
Options indulgence                                                  3

Total syns                                                               10

I do hope these Success Express days do the trick, we are staying with friends on Saturday for a birthday celebration, so I'm hoping to limit the damage then, and still get a good loss next week. 

It's definitely been a frustrating day, being all geared up for work and then hearing you can't go back is a bit of a blow as I want to get back to normal, and this feels like a real spanner in the works, especially as my GP's surgery is being a bit crappy when it comes to appointments at the moment. Oh well, I shall try to focus on the positives, I DID make it back into work, and I would have been in tonight if I was allowed, that's progress. I also have a gorgeous new bike to look forward to, although I want it NOW and patience never was a virtue of mine, plus I'll be celebrating a birthday with much loved and much missed friends in a couple of days time - despite me feeling a bit anxious about that too - stupid broken brain!

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