Tuesday, 18 March 2014

Picture Heavy!

It's been a while since I blogged again, only partly due to us being in London for the weekend, as I didn't blog on Friday either...Ooops! So I'll whizz through the highlights before catching you up with today.

Except for Saturday and Sunday I've been following Success Express, in an effort to minimise the damage of a birthday party! Friday had a couple of hightlights...

My Wellness@Work award reward of £50 in vouchers arrived, which was rather fabulous, and my Incredible Meep t-shirt arrived as well - which is simply made of the awesome! Food wise, I was angelic, with much emphasis on my superfree, and the discovery that Lindor teeny bunnies are only 3 syns! Nom! Not such a good day for Boo, who needed a bath.

Saturday started off quite normally, with me heading into town early...

...and having a coffee whilst I waited for the shops to open, yes I was up that early! I picked up a shirt and some cufflinks for Hague, before heading to the shops to pick up some bits for us to nom on during the drive in our efforts to minimise damage. So once Hague had kickboxed, I had napped and bathed and Boo had been dropped off at her Nanny's it was time to head down to London to celebrate my wonderful friend Anna's 40th birthday. Despite me feeling anxious about seeing people (stupid brain), I had a truly fabulous time!

I may have indulged in many sandwiches, glasses of fizz, cupcakes, alkyhol and birthday cake though....Oopsie. Despite being up past 4am, we were up and alive in the morning - and we woke to glorious sunshine! We decided on an al fresco lunch on the drive home, embracing the off plan-ness of the weekend thus far.

Can we count this as my entry for the make up free selfie campaign? I hadn't brought any with me lol!

As we'd stopped at a designer outlet place, I even managed to pick up a perfume I'd fallen in love with, but been told wasn't available on it's own anymore, that was my happy photo for Sunday! 

Right, Monday, a day I'd been dreading, another attempt at a return to work, only after I'd spoken to our Occupational Health, and my manager, and Occupational Health again - the joys of a phased return. I did get through the 4 hours though, following SE all the way still! I was utterly frazzled after work, I'd only completed 4 hours but it felt like much more as I'd been panicky and anxious almost the whole time, not great. So I tried to head to bed early, only to be thwarted by my whizzy brain and my stupid tennis-y elbow. I stayed in bed for as long as possible today, only dragging myself up when time started running out on me. Luckily, I'd got breakfast all prepped the night before.

Yogurt and fruit has pretty much been my staple breakfast this week, and today's mix was frozen forest fruits, raspberries, a plum and a pear, all mixed with my HeB of muesli and yogurt. Once it was eaten, I had time for a very quick cuppa before being all brave and getting ready for work again.

As I was "only" there for 4 hours again, I only had one break, and so only one snack.

I'd started out not feeling too bad, but the anxious feelings gradually grew throughout the day, despite me having Hague and TOK on the end of email, I do hope this gets easier very, very soon! I suppose I have to focus on the fact that I am getting through these shifts, however hard I'm finding it. At least I now have the welcome distraction of a long weekend in Bristol to visit my lovely TOK-a-liscious to plan now!

When I got in, Hague had got dinner ready for me, I'd fancied a jacket spud, so he ensured that I had plenty of superfree on the side!

I've got both my HeA's of cheddar on there, and a huge pile of courgettes, peppers, spinach and mushrooms, it was gorgeous! With that eaten, I shifted off Hague to kickboxing and then settled down with some Supersize vs Superskinny and dessert.

Just 5½ syns for a little tub of super nom :o) By the time Dr Christian was done it was time to go and get Hague and settle down on the sofa. For my last meal of the day, I abandoned Success Express, mainly as I really fancied egg baps!

I must say though, I fried the eggs using my latest "gadget", a ceramic frying pan. I'd heard a lot about how great they are, and super non stick, so when I saw them cheap I thought I'd give them a go. Well, colour me super impressed! Those eggs were dancing around the pan like bambi on ice, and there was nothing in there at all! I might now save a bloody fortune on frylight! The fruity dessert (and the teeny bunny hiding in there) has been picked at whilst I've been typing and getting you all up to date, but now it's time to head for a lovely hot bath and bed before facing those scales tomorrow....eek!

Food Diary (Tuesday)

Free Food
black forest fruits
fat free natural yogurt
fat free cottage cheese with chives

Healthy Extras
A - (both) - 40g reduced fat Cheddar
B - 40g simply fruity Dorset Cereals muesli
B - 60g wholemeal bread

tbsp Kraft light honey and mustard dressing           1
Tesco healthy choices caramel dessert                   5½
30g wholemeal bread                                            3
Mini Lindor bunny                                                 3

Total syns                                                             12½

A not too detailed account of my last few days there I'm afraid, I have enjoyed Success Express though, which has surprised me, as previously I've struggled with it. It remains to be seen how successful it's been with my overly off plan 24 hours in the middle though!

Despite the truly uplifting time I had on Saturday, it's been a hard week. With my stop/start return to work, and the anxiety I've been feeling it's not been great. Even today at work I struggled, starting out okay but struggling for the last 2 hours or so. It's so hard, and people just don't seem to understand as it's not something you can see. I know I'll get through this, I just have to keep trying and trying and focusing on the good things, and of course my #100happydays which I'm posting on Twitter, today's was the lovely sight that greeted me when a weary, and anxious me pulled up outside the house after work...

...my sweet little JadeyPuss and my lovely warm house, waiting for me. That always makes me happy.

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